Eaglesong is from watching two eagles one day do a mating spiral freefall. I thought to myself now THAT is a partnership. Slowly soaring up and circling to a height then locking talons and tumbling head over heels, out of control but trusting each other. It was one of the most amazing things I have ever seen.
Also, Eagle and I talk. I like to fly above the storms of life seeing the big picture. A chess player. Thinking six moves down.
I am not looking for a Partner right now. I have work to do that I need to do alone. Someday. Hopefully. But for now, I have a women’s spirituality app through which I have made incredible female friends the world over. I need some incredible male friends.
It is a stickier path making male friends, I get that. Sexual attraction, disingenuous intent – they come into play. But I believe when you talk things through with compassion, honesty, and pure intent, anything is possible.
I was absent from this site for awhile (speaking of a Spiritual dating site.) I think this site is great but everyone tends to be so far away. It would be lovely to have a friend to hike with and hang out every once in awhile. I tried Match. Ufta. The result was that I saw just how far I have departed from that train station in Normal. I do not care for chit-chat, getting lost in negativity, materialism. Unbalanced communication.
I am happiest sitting in the woods quiet until they come alive.
Sitting in Circle with friends, singing, poetry, incense burning, slowing down, candles, opening up, trusting, getting vulnerable, looking within, slipping into different worlds, breathing. Breathing.
My new home, I have a roommate with 13 chickens. A good number. I like numbers. One dog, and she lives in her tiny home on the back of my property. We just got her a solar generator. Not the dog, but my roommate. Each day, I step a bit closer to learning how to live with my land and home instead of conquering it. I step through fear to do this because I was raised in the ‘you need a man’ mindset.
I do not.
But I would like having some good ones around.
I believe that men need to evolve past that ‘I can only have one intimate female relationship in my life.’ It is a false construct put into place by the tyrannical Old Testament Christian God that says you cannot control your urge to mate (and should) so you must limit yourself to having a relationship with just one woman.
I cannot imagine just having one female friend. Each fills different needs. And over the years, I have amassed a half a dozen or so that are ‘Home’ to me. We know and trust each other. I can tell them anything and vice versa. Laughter. Joy. There is nothing quite like a friend where you are not fulfilling any roles, expectations or responsibilities in the others life so you can just Be There for each other.
I would like to find the equivalent with some men.
A final straw for my separation was that after suffering from long term COVID effects, I was the heaviest weight I had ever been in my life, went into the doctor after blood tests and had several horrible results. The doctor suggested medication and I said no thanks let me work on it first. I stopped drinking, smoking and went vegan. Have dropped several sizes in clothes and feel incredible. It was a catalyst for all the things I really needed to do in my life. Good can come along with bad if you let it.
If I am not looking for a Partner, I do not see why it matters, but I do understand that our body is the shell that we are given for this lifetime, and we should take care of it. I am taking care of it now. As I cannot do the things I intend to do if I am out of breath and overweight.
As for the rest of me, sometimes I look into the mirror and I see the gorgeous Goddess that I am. And yes, I am most definitely on a Path with Goddess. I believe this is a time in the world of creating balance.
Other times, I see this fierce and powerful Hag. ‘Hag’ btw is a word that was twisted. Its roots are actually ‘Witch’. And Witch does not have to do with religion. It has to do with a way of walking through the World or Worlds, relating to the Earth and nature. I am most definitely a Witch. Does not mean I have different colored candles and a book of shadows. So much work to be done in the world right now taking back and repositioning perspectives from the ‘losing sides’ of ‘his’story.
More on ‘Hag’ from Wikipedia: “In Irish and Scottish mythology, the cailleach is a Hag Goddess concerned with creation, harvest, the weather, and sovereignty. In partnership with the goddess Bríd, she is a seasonal goddess, seen as ruling the winter months while Bríd rules the summer. In Scotland, a group of hags, known as The Cailleachan (The Storm Hags) are seen as personifications of the elemental powers of nature, especially in a destructive aspect. They are said to be particularly active in raising the windstorms of spring, during the period known as A Chailleach.
Hags as sovereignty figures abound in Irish mythology. The most common pattern is that the hag represents the barren land, who the hero of the tale must approach without fear, and come to love on her own terms. When the hero displays this courage, love, and acceptance of her hideous side, the sovereignty hag then reveals that she is also a young and beautiful goddess.[3”
All of us older women carry all the aspects within us of maiden, mother and crone. Just as most men carry heavier doses of warrior, protector and hunter. I believe they just need to balance it better in a benevolent means while also acknowledging their vulnerability. Can you say that without cringing, ‘vulnerability’? If not, you most likely have some work ahead of you.
Again, so much work to be done in the world right now for those who wish to use their eyes to truly see.
- Ironically the picture is from someone in Illinois. Perhaps these are the very two eagles that I saw. The world is often so very small.